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Top Ten Gruesome Spam List
Once a year, I buy a can of Spam. After all, it can't be so bad if Monty Python composed an entire song about it, right? Usually, this lonesome can gets taken on a camping trip (making it too late to change our minds when it is time to eat it). This particular list came into existence on one of those notorious camping trips many years ago.
My husband, youngest brother, and I were out camping, bravely ignoring the rain. (Why does it always rain when I go camping?) On the final morning, we discovered that we had put off eating that can of Spam and it was the only thing that probably wouldn't need a roaring fire to cook. So we set the can on the picnic table, and it watched us rush through collapsing the tent, loading the car, and hoping we'd finish so we could go to McDonald's. (Maybe, in truth, we were hoping we'd forget to pack it...) With just the tarp over the table left to put away, we sat down at the table and looked around at the rain pouring down (not drizzling, mind you, but pouring out of the sky in a great gushing waterfall).
As we sat there, staring at each other, tummies growling, with that can of Spam tormenting us, one of us (and I don't remember who), mentioned that maybe Spam didn't need to be cooked. We like our campfires, and didn't bring one of those gas grills along. So we read the label of the Spam can. Yum! Let's just pack the tarp and get out of here! Are we going to let the weather chase us away? Never! So my brother mentioned that he had some of those Sterno cans of instant fire goop, that he packed "just in case". Camping is a wonderful time to clean out the strange things in your closet and see if they are really useful or not.
An important part of our camping trips is that you have to be determined to have a good time. Even if the tent leaks, the car gets stuck on a rock, or cows chase you higher ground. So next thing you know, there's that Spam, cooking over a nice off-color Sterno flame. So as it cooks, what are the ten worst things you can think of about Spam? And here's that list that we laughed and joked about before we left for drier shelter.
Going from bad to worst: